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Cry for Redemption

…there was nothing…but to keep chasing the high, reality became too painful…married you so…you could not testify against him?…

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Built Up in Love

…Know that you are loved…

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Musings on a Tuesday

Hello dear Friends, It has been such a struggle during this cold and gloomy weather to drag myself out of bed, to put my feet on the floor, to be motivated at all. I have in my mind always that I should be helping other people to come to know Jehovah, to help them see […]

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That Brave Girl

The decision to enter my painting in an art show at a real art gallery was easy to make. I believe I am being motivated by fear, having learned while Pops was in hospital that I will basically be destitute after he dies or if he must be placed in a home. I had always […]

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Why Do I Hurt Myself?

I answered his call tonight. What a foolish foolish girl. I knew that it was wrong, to talk to the abuser, but I did it anyway. After years of being strong, of cutting out the gangrenous heart of me. How could I sell my broken soul out so cheaply? I knew he would say something […]

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I Want To LIVE!!!

¬†Have you ever been given a second chance? I really feel today like I have. A chance to suck in all the air I can breath, see all the colors of the spectrum, and dance under a starry sky!! I had been having sharp pain in my right shoulder and right leg, which I have […]

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The Wind of Change…

I am so tired, and I don’t want to write. I just want the pain to go away. Fifteen minutes, or even ten. Let me please feel nothing. But nothingness is death, and it is wrong to want death. Jehovah knows my pain, and He did not cause it. It is unthinkable that the God […]

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Whispers from a Distant Past

The receptionist wasn’t fired! I feel so much better now!! I made it to the appt. I had at noon today at the Mental Health Facility.( I will make an effort not to berate myself or others with mental health issues by calling the place by derogatory names. So, I will abbreviate it to M.H.F.) […]

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life lessons

My Job is to be Me

A supreme effort was needed this morning to get out of bed, but I did it! I raced around, getting ready for my 9am appointment. Then caring for Dad and the animals started to eat up my time, and I tried desperately to stop all the activity, but it was no use. When I jumped […]