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The SLOG of Joy

Grumble. Growl. Grunt. .   Swear. Sweat. Stomp. . Punch. Pound. Pant. .  Breathe. Binge. Boss. .  Shout. Scream, Smear. .  Fall in a heap, exhausted. Then get up, clean up, and do it all over again. .  There is joy in this. This “living” we do. No matter how sweaty, or dirty, or ugly, this […]

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angels apostles beaten Beauty bible bipolar disorder bravery broken heart child abuse chronic pain clean and sober codependency compassion coping courage death dementia depression emotions enduring everlasting life exhaustion faith family fear Forgiveness freedom gardening God's love gratitude grief growth guilt happiness healing help home hope injuries injustice inner peace insanity insomnia Jehovah God Jesus Christ Joy kindness life life lessons loneliness loss Love memories mental illness metamorphosis nature pain paintings paradise peace poems poet poetry prayers preaching ransom sacrifice of Jesus Christ recovery regret repent repentance responsibility sacrifice sadness safety sanity self awareness self help sinner sleep sobriety sorrow suicide survival survivor therapy treasure war witness worry

A Psalm of My Own

Written after Fighting With Myself All Night .           Jehovah knows my suffering, hears my pleas each day .          He knows the pain this madness brings, knows I’m made of clay .          I thought I’d be forsaken, and all my hope was lost .  […]

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3 Hours Sleep and I’m Feelin’ Good!

Righty O! How about that Picture, huh? Oh, my… .   That’s my “I’m so tired I can fall down right in this spot and sleep for a month” face. And it’s none too pretty. It’s also the most unflattering view of my nose…I was never unhappy with my nose until my Ex broke it . […]

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abortion addiction alzheimer's angels animals apostles art artist babies beaten Beauty bible bipolar disorder bppv bravery broken heart cancer caregivers cares child abuse children chronic pain clean and sober codependency compassion coping courage Dad daughters death depression domestic violence earth emotions enduring eternal life everlasting life exhaustion faith family Fathers fear Forgiveness freedom gardens God's love God's Word gratitude grief growth guilt happiness healing help home homecoming hope injuries injustice inner peace insanity insomnia Jehovah God Jehovah's promises Jesus Christ Joy life life lessons loneliness loss Love memories mental illness mothers murder nature pain paradise peace poems prayers preaching predjudice PTSD pulmonary embolism ransom sacrifice of Jesus Christ rape recovery repentance responsibility sacrifice sadness sanity Scriptures self help sexual abuse sexual assault Shame shot at sinner sobriety sorrow stabbed suicide survival survivor The last Supper therapy treasure violence war wild witness Writing

Secrets…Many Secrets

     Should we tell our secrets? Burden our loved one’s with them? Jeopardize our relationships with society, our peers? Risk our reputations? .     Many people choose not to. Instead they carry that burning bucket of nastiness hidden away deep inside. Letting it rot away all their prospects for joy, searing their potential away […]

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addiction angels babies bible bipolar disorder bravery broken heart brothers change child abuse children compassion coping courage Dad daughters death depression disciple making Embarrassment emotions Equality exhaustion faith family family relationships Fathers fear Forgiveness freedom friendship gratitude grief growth guilt guts happiness hate healing help home homecoming hope inhumane injustice insanity Joy judicial system kindness life life lessons loneliness loss Love memories metamorphosis mothers murder pain paradise peace pollution prayers preaching predjudice PTSD recovery regret repent responsibility sadness safety sanity self help Shame shot at sinner sobriety sorrow survival therapy treasure violence walking war witness worry

Who Do I Think I Am?

I do silly things sometimes. Fairly often, in reality. Most of the time they are thoughtless mistakes, quickly forgotten by all who have been effected by them. There was a time, in the past life I lived, the one I talk so much about on this site, that I did intentionally bad things. Things that […]

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addiction aging parents alzheimer's angels animals apostles beaten Beauty bible bipolar disorder Birds bravery broken heart brothers caregivers caregiving change child abuse chronic pain compassion coping courage Dad daughters death dementia depression domestic violence earth emotions enduring Equality eternal life Eternal life in paradise exhaustion faith family Fathers fear Forgiveness freedom friendship funeral parlor God's love gratitude grief growth guts happiness hate healing help home homecoming hope inhumane injuries injustice inner peace insanity Jehovah's promises Jesus Christ Joy judicial system jungle kindness life life lessons loneliness loss Love memories mental illness mothers murder nature neighbors pain paradise peace poems pollution prayers preaching predjudice PTSD ransom sacrifice of Jesus Christ recovery regret repent repentance responsibility rest sacrifice sadness safety sanity Scriptures self awareness self help sexual assault shot at sinner sobriety soil soldiers sorrow stabbed suicide survival survivor The last Supper The Memorial therapy treasure Vietnam War violence war wild witness worry

THE PAIN of it ALL

What do I say to a black mother whose son was murdered at the hands, or knee, of a white man? .   I saw George dying, in front of all the world, murdered. Every fiber of my being cried out for action to save him, knock that cop off of him, hurt those who were […]

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apostles Beauty bible Birds bravery broken heart brothers butterflies change children compassion courage daughters death disciple making disciples earth emotions enduring eternal life Eternal life in paradise everlasting life faith family Fathers Forgiveness freedom friendship gardens God's love God's Word gratitude grief growth happiness healing help home homecoming hope inner peace Jehovah God Jehovah's promises Jesus Christ Joy kindness life life lessons Love memories metamorphosis mothers nature neighbors paradise peace poems poetry prayers preaching ransom sacrifice of Jesus Christ recovery repent repentance responsibility sacrifice sadness safety sanity sinner sleep sorrow survivor The last Supper The Memorial treasure witness

Full Heart

Will humans today heed the warning? In these times of pain and mourning ?

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bipolar disorder bravery broken heart chronic pain codependency courage Dad daughters depression faith family family relationships Fathers fear Forgiveness God's love gratitude grief guts happiness hate healing home hope injustice insanity insomnia life life lessons loneliness loss Love memories mental illness metamorphosis pain poems poet poetry prayers predjudice PTSD pulmonary embolism rape recovery regret repent sacrifice sadness sanity sexual abuse sinner sleep sobriety soldiers sorrow stabbed suicide survival survivor therapy violence war wild witness worry Writing

I Will Tell the Truth Now

I will make a huge effort to tell the truth. I always fluff things up, until I am not even sure what my truth is. My Dad was a SUPER Exaggerator , and an Embellisher of the highest order, and I hung on his every word. I could see others staring up at him, eyes […]

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apostles Beauty bible bravery broken heart brothers change clean compassion coping courage death disciple making earth enduring eternal life Eternal life in paradise everlasting life faith family Fathers Forgiveness freedom friendship gardens God's love God's Word gratitude happiness healing help home homecoming hope inner peace Jehovah God Jehovah's promises Jesus Christ Joy kindness life Love love. Jehovah God mothers pain paradise peace prayers preaching ransom sacrifice of Jesus Christ repent repentance sacrifice sadness sinner sorrow The last Supper The Memorial treasure

Gratitude, More and More!

I have been reminded of God’s Love for me. I commemorated the Memorial of Jesus Last meal with his apostles on Friday. At Sundown, with my fellow worshipers’ of Jehovah, we gathered at sunset and  did just as Jesus commanded his followers to do: passing first the unleavened bread, then the wine . The ceremony, […]

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abortion accidents addiction beaten bible bipolar disorder bppv bravery broken heart child abuse chronic pain clean clean and sober codependency compassion coping courage daughters death depression disciple making domestic violence emotions enduring exhaustion faith family relationships Forgiveness freedom gratitude grief guts happiness hate healing help home injuries injustice insanity Joy life life lessons loneliness loss Love memories mental illness pain prayers preaching predjudice PTSD ransom sacrifice of Jesus Christ rape recovery regret repent sacrifice sadness safety sanity self confidence self help sexual abuse sexual assault shot at sinner sobriety sorrow stabbed suicide survival survivor therapy violence witness worry Writing

Sexual Assault Awareness Month

What this means to me : I hope that it means that some where, in this great big world, a child won’t be violated tonight…because someone talked to a parent, a trusted adult, a mental health professional, a trusted member of law enforcement, a dear friend, and told them what had happened. And that the […]