…there was nothing…but to keep chasing the high, reality became too painful…married you so…you could not testify against him?…
Cry for Redemption

…there was nothing…but to keep chasing the high, reality became too painful…married you so…you could not testify against him?…
…Know that you are loved…
Grumble. Growl. Grunt. . Swear. Sweat. Stomp. . Punch. Pound. Pant. . Breathe. Binge. Boss. . Shout. Scream, Smear. . Fall in a heap, exhausted. Then get up, clean up, and do it all over again. . There is joy in this. This “living” we do. No matter how sweaty, or dirty, or ugly, this […]
Should we tell our secrets? Burden our loved one’s with them? Jeopardize our relationships with society, our peers? Risk our reputations? . Many people choose not to. Instead they carry that burning bucket of nastiness hidden away deep inside. Letting it rot away all their prospects for joy, searing their potential away […]
I will make a huge effort to tell the truth. I always fluff things up, until I am not even sure what my truth is. My Dad was a SUPER Exaggerator , and an Embellisher of the highest order, and I hung on his every word. I could see others staring up at him, eyes […]
What this means to me : I hope that it means that some where, in this great big world, a child won’t be violated tonight…because someone talked to a parent, a trusted adult, a mental health professional, a trusted member of law enforcement, a dear friend, and told them what had happened. And that the […]
I did something today that has me all twisted up inside like it just happened…And I thought I was SO far Over It, So Healed, So Strong, So SMART. All the years and years and years of therapy, and here I am again. Bruised, tattered, and lying on the cold floor of a dark green tent, somewhere […]
I am here again, on lock down of my own making. Wanting the isolation while longing for company. I feel unsure, unsteady, and oh, so tired. The dialogue inside my head has slowed, and the gist of it is dire, down and miserable. I hate myself like this, and that adds to my misery because […]
The wind blows, my mind slips back into some disturbing dream. Was it me then, or is it me now? I can’t believe where I have been. I yearn for escape, memories come reminding me what I have done. I chose a new way, on a hopeful day, changed my methods and my means… […]
I have been spinning my wheels today, trying for hours to get my blogs here on WordPress all straightened out. It is very difficult to keep settings and numbers straight in my head since I sustained that TBI (Traumatic Brain Injury) in a fall in 2013. Along with all the other physical and Mental challenges […]