Category: self confidence

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accidents addiction art beaten bipolar disorder bppv bravery change chronic pain clean and sober codependent compassion coping courage depression domestic violence emotions enduring exhaustion faith fear freedom gratitude growth happiness healing help hope injuries injustice Joy kindness life life lessons loss Love mental illness pain paradise peace prayers PTSD recovery rest safety sanity self confidence self help survivor therapy walking

The Discomfort of Disbelief

"The Sentinel's Prayer", acrylic on canvas, Susan T. Martin2017

“The feeling of being doubted…is an ever-present background noise…”

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accidents addiction alzheimer's angels apostles art art show artist babies beaten Beauty bible bipolar disorder bppv bravery broken heart cancer caregiving change child abuse chronic pain clean and sober codependency colo/rectal cancer compassion coping courage Dad daughters death dementia depression emotions enduring eternal life everlasting life exhaustion faith family Fathers fear Forgiveness freedom gardening God's love God's Word gratitude grief growth guilt guts happiness hate healing help hitchhiking home homecoming hope inhumane injuries injustice inner peace insanity insomnia Jehovah God Joy judicial system jungle kindness life life lessons loneliness loss Love love. Jehovah God memories mental illness metamorphosis milkweed murder napping nature pain paintings paradise peace pets poems poet poetry pollution prayers preaching predjudice PTSD ransom sacrifice of Jesus Christ rape recovery regret repent repentance responsibility rest sacrifice sadness safety Sailfish Point sanity Scriptures self awareness self confidence self help sexual abuse sexual assault Shame sinner sleep smoking sobriety soldiers sorrow stabbed suicide survival survivor The last Supper The Memorial therapy treasure Uncategorized Vietnam War violence war wild animals witness Writing

The SLOG of Joy

So many Secrets©STMartin

Grumble. Growl. Grunt. .   Swear. Sweat. Stomp. . Punch. Pound. Pant. .  Breathe. Binge. Boss. .  Shout. Scream, Smear. .  Fall in a heap, exhausted. Then get up, clean up, and do it all over again. .  There is joy in this. This “living” we do. No matter how sweaty, or dirty, or ugly, this […]

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aging parents animals art artist Beauty bravery butterflies cancer change child abuse children chronic pain clean clean and sober codependent compassion coping courage Dad daughters depression domestic violence Embarrassment emotions family family relationships freedom friendship gardens gratitude growth guts happiness healing home homecoming hope injuries inner peace Joy kindness life life lessons Love memories mothers pain paradise peace poems rape recovery rest sadness safety sanity self awareness self confidence self help survival survivor therapy treasure violence walking

SUSAN IS HERE! NEVER FEAR!!!

seems like an eternity ago, when my hair was long, and I still felt pretty. This is before all the accidents, surgeries and injuries and before Mom died.

…there is no “wait until” time to be beautiful…

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animals artist babies Beauty Birds bravery broken heart butterflies change children clean clean and sober codependent compassion conservation coping courage daughters earth emotions eternal life everlasting life faith family Fathers fear Forgiveness freedom friendship gardening gardens God's love gratitude growth happiness healing home homecoming hope injuries injustice inner peace Jesus Christ Joy jungle life life lessons Love memories Monarch butterflies mothers nature neighbors pain paradise peace pets planting poet pollution prayers puppies ransom sacrifice of Jesus Christ recovery repent repentance rest sacrifice sanity self awareness self confidence shih-tzus sinner sobriety survival survivor The Memorial therapy treasure trees walking wild wild animals wildlife witness

The CLEAN Effect!

      Yessssssss….Deep inhale….Yessssss…. .  There is often some bright speck, a teeny-weeny glint, in the midst of devastation. Often this tiny glimmer of good goes unseen for years, decades, even centuries. I’m sure there have been major disasters where no bright side was ever found, the loss being only that. A loss. Losses. […]

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apostles art Beauty bible Birds bravery broken heart butterflies caregiving chronic pain codependency compassion coping courage Dad daughters disciples dogs earth emotions enduring Eternal life in paradise everlasting life faith family family relationships fear Forgiveness freedom friendship gardening gardens God's love God's Word gratitude growth happiness healing help home hope inner peace Jehovah's promises Jesus Christ Joy kindness life life lessons loneliness Love memories metamorphosis Monarch butterflies mothers nature neighbors pain paradise peace pets prayers puppies ransom sacrifice of Jesus Christ recovery repentance responsibility rest sacrifice safety sanity self awareness self confidence self help shih-tzus survival survivor The last Supper The Memorial therapy treasure worry

We Are Going To Make It

Happy Joyous and Free©STMartin

Is anyone out there as old as I am? I grew up to the Mary Tyler Moore show, on every week as I recall. When I was 10 or so, she was beautiful to me, not just as a pretty woman (which she was and is, if she is still alive, is she?…)but as a […]

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abortion accidents addiction beaten bible bipolar disorder bppv bravery broken heart child abuse chronic pain clean clean and sober codependency compassion coping courage daughters death depression disciple making domestic violence emotions enduring exhaustion faith family relationships Forgiveness freedom gratitude grief guts happiness hate healing help home injuries injustice insanity Joy life life lessons loneliness loss Love memories mental illness pain prayers preaching predjudice PTSD ransom sacrifice of Jesus Christ rape recovery regret repent sacrifice sadness safety sanity self confidence self help sexual abuse sexual assault shot at sinner sobriety sorrow stabbed suicide survival survivor therapy violence witness worry Writing

Sexual Assault Awareness Month

Baby me in my favorite coat

What this means to me : I hope that it means that some where, in this great big world, a child won’t be violated tonight…because someone talked to a parent, a trusted adult, a mental health professional, a trusted member of law enforcement, a dear friend, and told them what had happened. And that the […]

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beaten bipolar disorder bravery broken heart child abuse chronic pain clean and sober codependency codependent coping courage Dad daughters depression domestic violence emotions enduring exhaustion family relationships Fathers fear Forgiveness grief growth guts hate healing help hope injuries injustice insanity kindness life life lessons loneliness loss Love memories mental illness pain peace prayers pregnancy ransom sacrifice of Jesus Christ rape recovery repent sacrifice sadness safety sanity self awareness self confidence self help sexual abuse sexual assault sinner sobriety sorrow stabbed suicide survival survivor therapy violence witness worry

Re-Abused, Re-Raped, Re-Traumatized

I did something today that has me all twisted up inside like it just happened…And I thought I was SO far Over It, So Healed, So Strong, So SMART. All the years and years and years of therapy, and here I am again. Bruised, tattered, and lying on the cold floor of a dark green tent, somewhere […]

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art artist bipolar disorder bravery broken heart change child abuse children chronic pain clean and sober codependency codependent compassion coping courage death depression domestic violence emotions exhaustion fear Forgiveness freedom God's love God's Word gratitude grief growth guts happiness hate healing hope injuries injustice inner peace insanity insomnia Jehovah God Jesus Christ Joy kindness life life lessons loneliness loss Love memories mental illness metamorphosis pain paintings paradise peace PTSD rape recovery regret repentance responsibility sacrifice sadness safety sanity self awareness self confidence self help sexual abuse sexual assault shot at sinner sleep sobriety sorrow stabbed suicide survival survivor therapy Uncategorized wild worry

Many Days Since

moody

I am here again, on lock down of my own making. Wanting the isolation while longing for company. I feel unsure, unsteady, and oh, so tired. The dialogue inside my head has slowed, and the gist of it is dire, down and miserable. I hate myself like this, and that adds to my misery because […]

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Beauty bible bipolar disorder bravery broken heart change child abuse children chronic pain clean and sober compassion coping courage Dad daughters death depression domestic violence emotions enduring eternal life Eternal life in paradise everlasting life exhaustion faith fear Forgiveness freedom fretting God's love God's Word gratitude grief growth happiness hate healing help hope injustice inner peace insanity insomnia Joy kindness life life lessons loneliness loss Love memories mental illness metamorphosis pain paradise peace poems poet poetry prayers preaching PTSD ransom sacrifice of Jesus Christ rape recovery regret repent repentance rest sacrifice sadness sanity self confidence self help sexual abuse sinner sorrow suicide survival survivor therapy treasure violence witness worry

Long Time Gone, a poem…

God's Sky(my photo)

The wind blows, my mind slips back into some disturbing dream. Was it me then, or is it me now? I can’t believe where I have been. I yearn for escape, memories come reminding me what I have done.   I chose a new way, on a hopeful day, changed my methods and my means… […]

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artist Beauty bible bipolar disorder bravery broken heart brothers butterflies change children chronic pain clean clean and sober compassion coping courage death depression disciple making disciples dogs domestic violence emotions enduring eternal life Eternal life in paradise everlasting life faith family family relationships fear Forgiveness freedom friendship God's love God's Word gratitude grief happiness hate healing help home homecoming hope injustice inner peace Jehovah God Jehovah's promises Jesus Christ Joy kindness life life lessons loneliness loss Love love. Jehovah God memories mental illness metamorphosis mothers neighbors pain paradise peace pets poems prayers preaching PTSD ransom sacrifice of Jesus Christ rape recovery repent repentance responsibility sacrifice sadness safety sanity self confidence self help sexual abuse sinner sobriety sorrow survival survivor The last Supper The Memorial therapy treasure witness

Hello from a NEW Perspective!

I have been spinning my wheels today, trying for hours to get my blogs here on WordPress all straightened out. It is very difficult to keep settings and numbers straight in my head since I sustained that TBI (Traumatic Brain Injury) in a fall in 2013. Along with all the other physical and Mental challenges […]