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aging parents alzheimer's angels Beauty bipolar disorder cancer caregivers chronic pain colo/rectal cancer compassion coping death dementia depression emotions enduring Fathers fear Forgiveness God's love guilt happiness healing home life lessons

What Do You Think

I think it is a challenge to live a solitary life. I don’t dislike it, but I reminisce  too much about sad events. It’s like my past has tentacles that slither out of the photo albums, out of the closets, out of the desks and cabinets to wrap themselves, insinuate themselves into my present. I […]

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accidents addiction alzheimer's angels apostles art art show artist babies beaten Beauty bible bipolar disorder bppv bravery broken heart cancer caregiving change child abuse chronic pain clean and sober codependency colo/rectal cancer compassion coping courage Dad daughters death dementia depression emotions enduring eternal life everlasting life exhaustion faith family Fathers fear Forgiveness freedom gardening God's love God's Word gratitude grief growth guilt guts happiness hate healing help hitchhiking home homecoming hope inhumane injuries injustice inner peace insanity insomnia Jehovah God Joy judicial system jungle kindness life life lessons loneliness loss Love love. Jehovah God memories mental illness metamorphosis milkweed murder napping nature pain paintings paradise peace pets poems poet poetry pollution prayers preaching predjudice PTSD ransom sacrifice of Jesus Christ rape recovery regret repent repentance responsibility rest sacrifice sadness safety Sailfish Point sanity Scriptures self awareness self confidence self help sexual abuse sexual assault Shame sinner sleep smoking sobriety soldiers sorrow stabbed suicide survival survivor The last Supper The Memorial therapy treasure Uncategorized Vietnam War violence war wild animals witness Writing

The SLOG of Joy

Grumble. Growl. Grunt. .   Swear. Sweat. Stomp. . Punch. Pound. Pant. .  Breathe. Binge. Boss. .  Shout. Scream, Smear. .  Fall in a heap, exhausted. Then get up, clean up, and do it all over again. .  There is joy in this. This “living” we do. No matter how sweaty, or dirty, or ugly, this […]

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angels apostles beaten Beauty bible bipolar disorder bravery broken heart child abuse chronic pain clean and sober codependency compassion coping courage death dementia depression emotions enduring everlasting life exhaustion faith family fear Forgiveness freedom gardening God's love gratitude grief growth guilt happiness healing help home hope injuries injustice inner peace insanity insomnia Jehovah God Jesus Christ Joy kindness life life lessons loneliness loss Love memories mental illness metamorphosis nature pain paintings paradise peace poems poet poetry prayers preaching ransom sacrifice of Jesus Christ recovery regret repent repentance responsibility sacrifice sadness safety sanity self awareness self help sinner sleep sobriety sorrow suicide survival survivor therapy treasure war witness worry

A Psalm of My Own

Written after Fighting With Myself All Night .           Jehovah knows my suffering, hears my pleas each day .          He knows the pain this madness brings, knows I’m made of clay .          I thought I’d be forsaken, and all my hope was lost .  […]

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addiction aging parents alzheimer's angels animals apostles beaten Beauty bible bipolar disorder Birds bravery broken heart brothers caregivers caregiving change child abuse chronic pain compassion coping courage Dad daughters death dementia depression domestic violence earth emotions enduring Equality eternal life Eternal life in paradise exhaustion faith family Fathers fear Forgiveness freedom friendship funeral parlor God's love gratitude grief growth guts happiness hate healing help home homecoming hope inhumane injuries injustice inner peace insanity Jehovah's promises Jesus Christ Joy judicial system jungle kindness life life lessons loneliness loss Love memories mental illness mothers murder nature neighbors pain paradise peace poems pollution prayers preaching predjudice PTSD ransom sacrifice of Jesus Christ recovery regret repent repentance responsibility rest sacrifice sadness safety sanity Scriptures self awareness self help sexual assault shot at sinner sobriety soil soldiers sorrow stabbed suicide survival survivor The last Supper The Memorial therapy treasure Vietnam War violence war wild witness worry

THE PAIN of it ALL

What do I say to a black mother whose son was murdered at the hands, or knee, of a white man? .   I saw George dying, in front of all the world, murdered. Every fiber of my being cried out for action to save him, knock that cop off of him, hurt those who were […]

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accidents animals beaten bible bipolar disorder bppv bravery change chronic pain clean and sober codependent compassion coping courage Dad death dementia depression domestic violence emotions enduring exhaustion fear fretting gardening gratitude grief growth guts happiness healing help home hope injuries injustice inner peace insanity insomnia Joy kindness life life lessons loneliness loss Love love. Jehovah God mental illness napping pain paradise prayers PTSD recovery responsibility rest safety sanity self awareness sexual assault sobriety sorrow stabbed survival survivor

VERTIGO, INSOMNIA and PAIN (oh, my!)

Cant wake up. I feel like I am sick inside, hot and cold, sticky and uncomfortable one minute , all dry and freezing the next. I feel like I’m going thru withdrawals, and twitchy, jerky-but from what?!? I feel that it is the Benign Paroxysmal Positional Vertigo that I have endured since a series of […]

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apostles art artist Beauty bible bipolar disorder bppv bravery broken heart cancer caregivers caregiving cats change children chronic pain clean and sober codependency colo/rectal cancer compassion coping courage Dad daughters death dementia depression disciple making earth emotions enduring eternal life Eternal life in paradise everlasting life exhaustion faith family family relationships Fathers fear Forgiveness freedom friendship God's love God's Word gratitude grief growth happiness healing help home homecoming hope inner peace insanity insomnia Jehovah God Jehovah's promises Jesus Christ Joy kindness life life lessons loneliness loss Love love. Jehovah God memories mental illness metamorphosis mothers pain paradise peace prayers preaching PTSD ransom sacrifice of Jesus Christ recovery regret repent repentance rest sacrifice sadness sanity self help shot at sleep sobriety sorrow survival survivor The last Supper The Memorial therapy treasure witness

Oh Happy Day!

I am happy to say, I was able to get back into my blogs here at WordPress, after a lengthy absence. I was unable to remember my sign in information for the longest time, but finally I was able to get back here!!! My sister blog, Out of the Gutter Art, has been languishing also, […]

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apostles artist beaten Beauty bible bipolar disorder bravery broken heart brothers change child abuse chronic pain clean and sober codependency codependent compassion coping courage Dad daughters death dementia depression disciple making disciples domestic violence emotions enduring eternal life Eternal life in paradise everlasting life exhaustion faith family Fathers fear Forgiveness freedom friendship God's love God's Word gratitude grief growth happiness healing help home hope injuries injustice inner peace insanity insomnia Jehovah God Jehovah's promises Jesus Christ Joy kindness life life lessons loneliness loss Love memories mental illness metamorphosis mothers neighbors pain paradise peace prayers preaching PTSD pulmonary embolism ransom sacrifice of Jesus Christ rape recovery regret repent repentance responsibility rest sacrifice sadness safety sanity sexual assault sinner sleep sobriety sorrow stabbed suicide survival survivor The last Supper The Memorial therapy treasure violence wild animals witness

Musings on a Tuesday

Hello dear Friends, It has been such a struggle during this cold and gloomy weather to drag myself out of bed, to put my feet on the floor, to be motivated at all. I have in my mind always that I should be helping other people to come to know Jehovah, to help them see […]

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angels artist Beauty bible bipolar disorder bravery broken heart brothers child abuse chronic pain clean and sober codependency compassion coping courage daughters death dementia depression domestic violence earth emotions enduring eternal life everlasting life exhaustion faith Fathers fear Forgiveness freedom friendship God's love God's Word gratitude grief growth guts happiness healing help home hope inner peace insanity insomnia Jehovah God Jesus Christ Joy kindness life life lessons loneliness loss Love memories mental illness metamorphosis mothers pain paradise peace prayers preaching ransom sacrifice of Jesus Christ rape recovery repent repentance responsibility rest sacrifice sadness safety sanity self awareness self help sexual abuse sinner sleep sobriety sorrow suicide survival survivor treasure violence witness worry

Where Am i? Where Have i been?

Strange days, these. People are acting wild, out of control. There is fear in their eyes, urgency in their speech. Anger in their hearts. I have been running away again, from storms, from memories, from emotions. Thankfully running towards God, who has taken me in, again. I am so grateful. I had a bad episode […]

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aging parents alzheimer's Beauty bible bipolar disorder bravery broken heart cancer caregivers caregiving change children chronic pain clean clean and sober codependency compassion coping courage Dad daughters death dementia depression emotions Eternal life in paradise everlasting life exhaustion faith family family relationships Fathers fear Forgiveness freedom friendship God's love God's Word gratitude grief growth happiness healing help home hope inner peace insomnia Jehovah God Jesus Christ Joy kindness life life lessons loneliness loss Love memories mental illness mothers pain paradise peace prayers preaching ransom sacrifice of Jesus Christ recovery repentance rest sacrifice sadness sinner sleep sorrow survivor The last Supper The Memorial treasure witness

Trying to Grieve

Whew, this is a toughie. Daddy died March 7,2016, and I know how you all have followed our journey. He was such an amazing man, and a great father(despite minor glitches, like most dads). But for me, he was my world in these last years. The reason I got up in the morning, the reason […]

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aging parents alzheimer's Beauty bible bipolar disorder bravery broken heart cancer children chronic pain codependency colo/rectal cancer compassion coping courage Dad daughters death dementia depression emotions enduring eternal life exhaustion family Fathers Forgiveness freedom friendship God's love gratitude grief growth happiness healing injustice inner peace life life lessons loss Love memories mental illness mothers pain peace prayers recovery regret repent responsibility rest sacrifice sadness safety sanity sleep sorrow survivor

Loving Too Much?

I have been my Dad’s Primary Caregiver for over six years now, and I was Mom’s before that as she battled and succumbed to colo/rectal cancer. It has been a long road, hard yes, but also full of love and tender moments that I treasure. Dad has been relatively pain free all his life, always […]