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The Night Air

Life on the southern Gulf Coast of Florida is pleasant for a portion of the year, when on the subject of weather. When I moved to South Florida in the early ’80’s we enjoyed it most of the year, and the few hottest months were July thru September. Then the most refreshing, crisp and dry […]

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aging parents alzheimer's angels Beauty bipolar disorder cancer caregivers chronic pain colo/rectal cancer compassion coping death dementia depression emotions enduring Fathers fear Forgiveness God's love guilt happiness healing home life lessons

What Do You Think

I think it is a challenge to live a solitary life. I don’t dislike it, but I reminisce  too much about sad events. It’s like my past has tentacles that slither out of the photo albums, out of the closets, out of the desks and cabinets to wrap themselves, insinuate themselves into my present. I […]

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3 Hours Sleep and I’m Feelin’ Good!

Righty O! How about that Picture, huh? Oh, my… .   That’s my “I’m so tired I can fall down right in this spot and sleep for a month” face. And it’s none too pretty. It’s also the most unflattering view of my nose…I was never unhappy with my nose until my Ex broke it . […]

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SUSAN IS HERE! NEVER FEAR!!!

…there is no “wait until” time to be beautiful…

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addiction aging parents alzheimer's angels animals apostles beaten Beauty bible bipolar disorder Birds bravery broken heart brothers caregivers caregiving change child abuse chronic pain compassion coping courage Dad daughters death dementia depression domestic violence earth emotions enduring Equality eternal life Eternal life in paradise exhaustion faith family Fathers fear Forgiveness freedom friendship funeral parlor God's love gratitude grief growth guts happiness hate healing help home homecoming hope inhumane injuries injustice inner peace insanity Jehovah's promises Jesus Christ Joy judicial system jungle kindness life life lessons loneliness loss Love memories mental illness mothers murder nature neighbors pain paradise peace poems pollution prayers preaching predjudice PTSD ransom sacrifice of Jesus Christ recovery regret repent repentance responsibility rest sacrifice sadness safety sanity Scriptures self awareness self help sexual assault shot at sinner sobriety soil soldiers sorrow stabbed suicide survival survivor The last Supper The Memorial therapy treasure Vietnam War violence war wild witness worry

THE PAIN of it ALL

What do I say to a black mother whose son was murdered at the hands, or knee, of a white man? .   I saw George dying, in front of all the world, murdered. Every fiber of my being cried out for action to save him, knock that cop off of him, hurt those who were […]

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aging parents alzheimer's Beauty bible bipolar disorder bravery broken heart cancer caregivers caregiving change children chronic pain clean clean and sober codependency compassion coping courage Dad daughters death dementia depression emotions Eternal life in paradise everlasting life exhaustion faith family family relationships Fathers fear Forgiveness freedom friendship God's love God's Word gratitude grief growth happiness healing help home hope inner peace insomnia Jehovah God Jesus Christ Joy kindness life life lessons loneliness loss Love memories mental illness mothers pain paradise peace prayers preaching ransom sacrifice of Jesus Christ recovery repentance rest sacrifice sadness sinner sleep sorrow survivor The last Supper The Memorial treasure witness

Trying to Grieve

Whew, this is a toughie. Daddy died March 7,2016, and I know how you all have followed our journey. He was such an amazing man, and a great father(despite minor glitches, like most dads). But for me, he was my world in these last years. The reason I got up in the morning, the reason […]

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addiction aging parents alzheimer's Beauty bible broken heart caregivers children chronic pain compassion coping courage Dad daughters death life lessons

Grief and Bipolar Disorder

Let me start this blog off by saying that I am not a health care professional, nor am I licensed in any form of mental health capacity. All I am is a person in pain, having lost a dear loved one, and who also happens to suffer from Bipolar Disorder. So, in a sense, that […]

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aging parents alzheimer's Beauty bible bipolar disorder bravery broken heart cancer children chronic pain codependency colo/rectal cancer compassion coping courage Dad daughters death dementia depression emotions enduring eternal life exhaustion family Fathers Forgiveness freedom friendship God's love gratitude grief growth happiness healing injustice inner peace life life lessons loss Love memories mental illness mothers pain peace prayers recovery regret repent responsibility rest sacrifice sadness safety sanity sleep sorrow survivor

Loving Too Much?

I have been my Dad’s Primary Caregiver for over six years now, and I was Mom’s before that as she battled and succumbed to colo/rectal cancer. It has been a long road, hard yes, but also full of love and tender moments that I treasure. Dad has been relatively pain free all his life, always […]

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aging parents alzheimer's life lessons

Where Am I?

The life is Busy, life of a caregiver. It revolves around his existence, the ebb and flow of his life force. He gets out of bed later each day, goes to bed earlier, communicates less, gazes dimly ahead more often. He wants to eat less, if ever. Sleep overcomes him in an instant, no matter […]

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aging parents bipolar disorder broken heart cancer caregiving children chronic pain daughters death depression Eternal life in paradise everlasting life healing help hope Jehovah's promises life life lessons lonliness loss Love love. Jehovah God mothers

A ONE HANDED ENTRY

this is tough, this being me. i say all kinds of euphemistic things: endure, be brave, be faithful… a memory stirs, i am back to missing you. i am glad you are not suffering. i am glad the pain is gone. but here i am left, wondering. how do i carry on? my life is like […]