Very tired.
One of the days when my bones feel like broken crystal
and my mind feels like mud.
sadness, lack of restorative sleep,
more sadness, less sleep
equals very tired, very hurt girl.
the highs always come with the lows
tied together.
dreams of freedom,
reality slapping me silly.
what to do? what to do? ask I
all I must do is too hard for me now.
struggle to keep eyes open,
struggle to see any light today.
pray for mercy,
knowing that the time for relief
is coming.
but is not yet. is not now.
focus my blurry eyes on distant day-
seems far away,
but I know the promise is certain.
going to lie down now.
wait for glimmer of happiness to return to my dark heart.
wait for spring, wait for daffodils.
wait.
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Author: Susan Todd Martin
I am an Artist, Poet and Author. A Survivor of Violent Sexual Abuse and Rape, I have lived thru Severe Domestic Violence, Twenty Three years of Addiction and Alcoholism, Family Dysfunction, Chronic Pain, Dependence on Opioids, and 2 Venomous Snake Bites...I have Been Stabbed, Shot at, Tied to a Tree and Choked Unconscious. A Quarter Horse Rolled on Me, as did a Lawn Tractor. I also Wrecked a Harley into a Tree! I also have PTSD and Rapid Cycling Bipolar Disorder, and spent my 18th birthday in a Locked Psychiatric Ward. I am so much more than this: I feel like a tiny seed that sprouted in a desert, and now has grown into a Passion Vine. My Art is my Voice, Screaming, Crying, Praying, Loving, Laughing, Healing- all in Riotous Color...
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