Just a note

it’s really late again. Each night I seem to stay up later, always listening to hear if Dad gets up in the night. I don’t want him to leave or anything. I went ahead last year and purchased an alarm system, thinking I could set it at night, and it would alert me if he opened a door. Well, I tried it last night and leapt 5 feet in the air when the alarm went off at 5 am. He got up to let the cat out. I could just squeeze that cat.
Tommorrow is the beginning of a new week. maybe the Cardiologist’s office will call with the heart catheterization set up. I hope it’s a mistake, and that I don’t have a blocked artery and need a stent. I didn’t find any of this out until I was sent for surgical clearance for my neck and back surgery, and I had a bad EKG, and then my Nuclear Stress Test didn’t turn out right either. I have been having chest pressure, but I figured that was from all the stress I go through taking care of dad. It’s how I used to feel when I would have panic attacks.
Ever since falling at that Resturant last year, I have had so many hurdles to…hurdle. Ha, ha, ha. I used to compete on the Flamingo Tour here in Florida, playing 9 ball. I used to dream of makng it pro before I got too old, but the accident totally destroyed my neck and shoulder. I came in 16th in 2012, and 12th the year before. I had just purchased my tour card for 2013 when I fell in that hole. And my life is changed forever. Again.
You know what they say: You gotta roll with the punches. I sure am tired of these punches. talk to you tomorrow…

Author: ST Martin

I am an Artist, Poet and Author. A Survivor of Violent Sexual Abuse and Rape, I have lived thru Severe Domestic Violence, Twenty Three years of Addiction and Alcoholism, Family Dysfunction, Chronic Pain, Dependence on Opioids, and 2 Venomous Snake Bites...I have Been Stabbed, Shot at, Tied to a Tree and Choked Unconscious. A Quarter Horse Rolled on Me, as did a Lawn Tractor. I also Wrecked a Harley into a Tree! I also have PTSD and Rapid Cycling Bipolar Disorder, and spent my 18th birthday in a Locked Psychiatric Ward. I am so much more than this: I feel like a tiny seed that sprouted in a desert, and now has grown into a Passion Vine. My Art is my Voice, Screaming, Crying, Praying, Loving, Laughing, Healing- all in Riotous Color...